So today I saw a bumper sticker that said “With Jesus.” Next to that was “Con Jesus” (Spanish for “With Jesus”). Underneath that was “Hakuna Matata,” accompanied by a picture of a lion’s head. Let me make it clear that this was all on one bumper sticker, not separate ones.

I was going to ask what interpretations you may have as to the exact meaning of this sticker, but just as I am writing this I realize that maybe it’s meant to be taken all together, like, “with Jesus you’ll have no worries.” Like if you accept him, you’re free sailing. As I just wrote that last sentence I realized there isn’t much sense to that explanation either. Does someone have a better or more reasonable explanation for this? Am I missing something? Not that I minded the sticker. In fact, I liked it better than those ever-present (in L.A.) “Jesus is God, Read the Bible/ Jesus es Dios, Lea la Biblia” bumper stickers. It’s much more upbeat, less forceful. The lion head visual was also a nice touch.

It reminded me of my favorite scene/deleted scenes in Talladega Nights when Cal (John C. Reilly) is telling everyone at the dinner table how he likes to picture Jesus — “I like to think of Jesus as an ice dancer, dressed in an all-white jumpsuit, and doing an interpretive dance of my life” and “I like to think of Jesus like with giant eagles wings, and singin’ lead vocals for Lynyrd Skynyrd with like an angel band and I’m in the front row and I’m hammered drunk! ” and “I like to think of Jesus as a mischievous badger”…”in a tuxedo shirt”…

So maybe from now on I will picture Jesus singing “Hakuna Matata,” doing a little barefoot dance, his long, white beard swaying in the soft jungle breeze. He has a wooden staff to use in the performance — Charlie Chaplin style — and behind Him are his little jungle friends, like a warthog and a lemur, singing backup, harmonizing as they trot along the dirt paths following Him with a spring in their step. With a Jesus like that in the world, there really would be no worries.